but thereafter: «I gradually acquired an eye for loneliness, became

systematically unsociable and made up my mind to devote entirely

to myself the rest of this fleeting life.» «I am not,” he reminded

himself repeatedly, «in my native place and not among beings who

are my equal.»

So the defenses against isolation were powerful and deep: he

voluntarily chose isolation, other beings were unworthy of his

company, his genius–based mission in life mandated isolation, the

life of geniuses must be a «monodrama,” and the personal life of a

genius must serve one purpose: facilitating the intellectual life

(hence, «the smaller the personal life, the safer, and thus the

better»).

At times Schopenhauer groaned under the burden of his

isolation. «Throughout my life I have felt terribly lonely and have

always sighed from the depths of my heart, ‘now give me a human

being` but, alas in vain. I have remained in solitude but I can

honestly and sincerely say it has not been my fault, for I have not

shunned or turned away anyone who was a human being.»

Besides, he said, he was not really alone because—and here

is another potent self–therapy strategy—he had his own circle of

close friends: the great thinkers of the world.

Only one such being was a contemporary, Goethe; most of

the others were from antiquity, especially the Stoics, whom he

quoted frequently. Almost every page of «About Me» contains

some aphorism spawned by a great mind supporting his own

convictions. Typical examples:

The best aid for the mind is that which once for all breaks the

tormenting bonds that ensnare the heart.—Ovid

Whoever seeks peace and quiet should avoid women, the

permanent source of trouble and dispute.—Petrarch

It is impossible for anyone not to be perfectly happy who

depends entirely upon himself and who possesses in himself all

that he calls his.—Cicero

A technique used by some leaders of therapy or personal

growth groups is the «who am I?» exercise; members write seven

answers to the question «who am I?» each on a different card, and

then arrange the cards in order of importance. Next they are asked

to turn over one card at a time, beginning with the most peripheral

answer and to meditate upon what it would be like to let go of (that

is, disidentify with) each answer until they get to the attributes of

their core self.

In an analogous manner, Schopenhauer tried on and

discarded various self attributes until he arrived at what he

considered his core self.

When, at times, I felt unhappy it was because I took myself to

be other than I was and then deplored that other person`s

misery and distress. For example, I took myself to be a lecturer

who does not become a professor and has no one to hear his

lectures; or to be one about whom this Philistine speaks ill or

that scandal monger gossips; or to be the lover who is not

listened to by the girl with whom he is infatuated; or to be the

patient who is kept home by illness; or to be other persons

afflicted with similar miseries. I have not been any of these; all

this is the stuff from which the coat has been made which I

wore for a short time and which I then discarded in exchange

for another.

But, then,who am I? I am the man who has writtenThe

World as Will and Representation which has given a solution

to the great problem of existence which perhaps will render

obsolete all previous solutions.... I am that man, and what

could disturb him in the few years in which he has still to draw

breath.

A related soothing strategy was his conviction that sooner or

later, probably after his death, his work would become known and

would drastically alter the course of philosophic inquiry. He first

began expressing this opinion early in life, and his belief in

ultimate success never wavered. In this he was similar to both

Nietzsche and Kierkegaard, two other independent and

unappreciated thinkers who were entirely (and correctly)

convinced that they would have posthumous fame.

He eschewed any supernatural consolations, embracing only

those based on a naturalistic worldview. For example, he believed

that pain ensues from the error of assuming that many of life`s

exigencies are accidental and, hence, avoidable. Far better to

realize the truth: that pain and suffering are inevitable, inescapable,

and essential to life—«that nothing but the mere form in which it

manifests itself depends on chance, and that our present suffering

fills a place...which, without it, would be occupied by some other

suffering. If such a reflection were to become a living conviction,

it might produce a considerable degree of stoical equanimity.»

He urged us to live and experience lifenow rather than live

for the «hope» of some future good. Two generations later

Nietzsche would take up this call. He considered hope our greatest

scourge and pilloried Plato, Socrates, and Christianity for focusing

our attention away from the only life that we have and toward

some future illusory world.

_________________________

Where are there

any real

monogamists? We

all live for a

time and, most

of us, always,

in polygamy.

And since every

man needs many

women, there is

nothing fairer

than to make it

incumbent upon

him to provide

for many women.

This will

reduce woman to

her true and

natural

position as a

subordinate

being.

_________________________

Pam opened the next meeting. «I`ve got something to announce

today.»

All heads turned toward her.

«Today is confession time. Go ahead, Tony.»

Tony bolted upright, stared at Pam for a long moment, then

leaned back in his chair, crossed his arms, and closed his eyes. If

he had been wearing a fedora, he would have pushed it down over

his face.

Pam, surmising that Tony had no intention of commenting,

continued in her clear bold voice, «Tony and I have been sexually

involved for a while, and it`s hard for me to keep coming here and

be silent about it.»

After a short charged silence came stuttered questions:

«Why?» «What started this?» «How long?» «How could you?»

«Where is it going?»

Quickly, coolly, Pam responded, «It`s been going on for

several weeks. I don`t know about the future, don`t know what

started it; it wasn`t premeditated but just happened one evening

after a meeting.»

«You going to join us today, Tony?» Rebecca asked gently.

Tony slowly opened his eyes. «It`s all news to me.»

«News? You saying that this is not true?»

«No. I mean confession day. This ‘go ahead, Tony`—

thatwas news to me.»

«You don`t look happy about it,” said Stuart.

Tony turned to address Pam: «I mean, I was over at your

place last night. Being intimate, you know. Intimacy—how many

time have I heard here that broads are more sensitive and want

more intimacy than plain old sexual intimacy? So why not be

intimate enough to talk to me, to run this ‘confession day` by me

first?»

«Sorry,” Pam said, without sounding sorry, «things weren`t

sitting right with me. After you left I was up much of the night

brooding and thinking about the group, and I realized time was too

short—we`ve got only six more meeting left. Am I counting right,

Julius?»