_________________________

The monuments,

the ideas left

behind by

beings like me

are my greatest

pleasure in

life. Without

books I would

long ago have

been in

despair.

_________________________

Julius entered the group room the following week to an odd scene.

The members, sprawled in their seats, were intently studying

Philip`s parable. Stuart had placed his copy on a clipboard and

underlined as he read. Having forgotten his copy, Tony was

reading over Pam`s shoulder.

Rebecca, with a hint of exasperation in her voice, began the

meeting: «I`ve read this with due diligence.» She held up Philip`s

handout, then folded it and put it in her purse. «I`ve given it

enough time, Philip, in fact, too much time, and now I`d like you

to disclose the relevance of this text to me or the group or Julius.»

«I think it would be a richer exercise if the class discussed it

first,” responded Philip.

«Class? That`s what this feels like—a class assignment. Is

this the way you do counseling, Philip? she asked, snapping her

purse shut. «Like a teacher in a classroom? This is not why I`m

here; I came for treatment, not for adult education.»

Philip took no note of Rebecca`s huffiness. «At best there

exists only a vague boundary between education and therapy. The

Greeks—Socrates, Plato, Aristotle, the Stoics and Epicureans—all

believed that education and reason were the tools needed to combat

human suffering. Most philosophical counselors consider

education to be the foundation of therapy. Almost all ascribe to

Leibniz`s mottoCaritas sapientis meaning ‘wisdom and care.`”

Philip turned toward Tony. «Leibniz was a German philosopher of

the seventeenth century.»

«I`m finding this tedious and presumptuous,” said Pam.

«Under the guise of helping Julius, you»—she raised her voice an

octave—«Philip, I`m talking to you...” Philip, who had been

tranquilly staring upward, jerked upright and turned toward Pam.

«First, you pass out this sophomoric assignment and now try to

control the group by coyly withholding your interpretation of the

passage.»

«Here you go once again trying to de–ball Philip,” said Gill.

«For God sakes, Pam, he`s a professional counselor. You don`t

need to be a rocket scientist to figure out that he`ll try to contribute

to the group by drawing from his own expertise. Why begrudge

him everything?»

Pam opened her mouth to speak but closed it, seemingly at a

loss for words. She stared at Gill, who added: «You asked for

straight feedback, Pam. You got it. And no, I`ve not been drinking,

if that`s what you`re thinking. I`m in my fourteenth day of

sobriety—I`ve been meeting with Julius twice a week—he`s turned

on the heat, tightened the screws, and got me going to an AA

meeting every day, seven days a week, fourteen meetings in

fourteen days. I didn`t mention it last week because I wasn`t sure I

could stick it out.»

All the members, save Philip, reacted strongly with nods and

congratulations. Bonnie told him she was proud of him. Even Pam

managed a «good for you.» Tony said, «Maybe I should join you.»

He pointed to his bruised cheek. «My boozing leads to bruising.»

«Philip, how about you? You got a response to Gill?» asked

Julius.

Philip shook his head. «He`s already had a good bit of

support from others. He`s sober, speaking out, gaining strength.

Sometimes more support is less.»

«I like that motto of Leibnitz you cited,Caritas sapientis —

wisdom and care,” said Julius. «But I urge you not to forget

the‘caritas` part. If Gill deserves support,why should you always

be last in line? And, what`s more, you`ve got unique information:

who else but you can expressyour feelings about his coming to

your defense and confronting Pam on your behalf?»

«Well said,” responded Philip. «I have mixed feelings. I

liked Gill`s support, and at the same time I`m wary of liking it.

Rely on others to do battle for you, and your own musculature will

atrophy.»

«Well, I`m going to reveal more of my ignorance,” said

Tony, pointing to the handout. «This boat story, Philip—I really

don`t understand it. You told us last week you were going to give

Julius something comforting, and yet this story about a boat and

passengers—I mean, to put it bluntly, I don`t know what the fuck

gives here.»

«Don`t apologize,” said Bonnie. «I told you, Tony, that you

almost always speak for me—I`m as confused as you are about this

ship and gathering shells.»

«Me too,” said Stuart. «I don`t get it.»

«Let me help,” said Pam. «After all, interpreting literature is

how I earn a living. First step is to go from the concrete—that is,

the ship, the shells, the sheep, and so on—to the abstract. In other

words, ask yourself: what does this ship or voyage or harbor

represent?»

«I think the ship stands for death—or the journey toward

death,” said Stuart, glancing at his clipboard.

«Okay,” said Pam. «So, where do you go from there?»

«Seems to me,” Stuart replied, «the main point isdon`t pay

so much attention to details on shore that you`ll miss the boat`s

sailing. ”

«So,” said Tony, «if you get too caught up in shore stuff—

even having a wife and kids—then the boat might sail without

you—in other words, you might miss your death. Big deal—is that

such a catastrophe?»

«Yeah, yeah, you`re right, Tony,” said Rebecca, «I also

understood the boat to be death, but when you put it that way I see

it doesn`t make sense.»

«I don`t get it either,” said Gill, «but it doesn`t say you`ll

miss death; it says you`ll go to it trussed up like the sheep.»

«Whatever,” said Rebecca, «but this still doesn`t feel like

therapy.» She turned to Julius, «This is supposed to be for you. Do

you find any comfort in this?»

«I`ll repeat what I said last time to you last week, Philip.

What I get is the knowledge that you want to give me something to

ease my ordeal. And also that you shy away from doing that

directly. Instead, you choose a less personal approach. Sets a future

agenda, I think, for you to work on expressing your caring in a

more personal way.

«As for the content,” Julius continued, «I`m confused also,

but this is how I understand it: since the boat might sail at any

time—that is, since death could call us at any point—we should

avoid getting too attached to the things of the world. Perhaps it

warns us that deep attachments would make dying more painful. Is

this the message of consolation you`re trying to give me, Philip?»

«I think,” Pam interjected before Philip could answer, «that

it falls into place better if you think of the ship and the journey not

as representing death but what we might call the authentic life. In

other words, we live more authentically if we keep focused on the

fundamental fact of sheer being, the miracle of existence itself. If

we focus on «being,” then we won`t get so caught up in the

diversions of life, that is, the material objects on the island, that we

lose sight of existence itself.»

A brief silence. Heads turned toward Philip.

«Exactly,” responded Philip with a hint of enthusiasm in his

tone. «My view exactly. The idea is that one has to beware of

losing oneself in life`s distractions. Heidegger called it falling or

being absorbed in theeverydayness of life. Now, I know you can`t