Holden continues, ‘I’m interested to see exactly how you’ve survived trials that have killed the likes of Baylis Airlan. His wolf travels back to Afaven Forest for his final rest while you stand here, yet again.’

Were he and Baylis close? I never noticed, but then, they were both knights of a similar age. Maybe they trained together. Fought together. I’m hardly surprised he assumed Baylis deserved a place above me. Deep down I probably thought the same at the beginning. But these trials have never been solely about who the strongest fighter is. These are Etta’s trials. The Goddess of Life. So what does it mean for me now that I’ve taken one? The vision of Oke’s dying eyes threatens to resurface, but with a sharp inhale, I push the image down and focus on the moment. With the way Holden feels about me, this spar could easily be as deadly as the next trial.

It’s only as Holden draws his sword that I realise it’s the first time I’ve actually seen him fight. Standing on the sidelines and barking orders? Absolutely. But fighting? No.

I step back as he performs an elaborate and utterly unnecessary flourish with his blade, while behind me, Benny clears his throat.

‘Left shoulder,’ he mutters between coughs.

A flicker of a smile touches my lips. I doubt Holden heard, but either way, I don’t care. At least now I’ve got a target. Yet as I fix my gaze entirely on his blade, an icy chill cascades down my spine. The last time a blade struck me, the metal froze under my touch and shattered. But surely that won’t happen here? I’ve fought in the yard hundreds of times and as far as I’m aware there are no Issen spectres doling out their magic inside these walls.

I swallow down the fear pounding through me. No, not fear. Nerves. That’s what Zelle told me. There’s only a dagger in my hand, and that’s not going to cut it, so I crouch to grab a sword.

It’s at that very moment that Holden chooses to lunge.

‘Watch out!’ Llinos yells as his sword whips towards me.

By some miracle, I block it, my own sword bracing just inches above my head as the metal clangs.

As my sword swings one way and then the next, blocking his strikes and attempting my own, a fluidity takes hold. There’s no time to think about the manner in which my feet are moving, nor any need. Turns out the hours of training have paid off. My movements are instinctive and my feet dance across the sand, adrenaline pounding through me, quickening each step.

A grimace contorts Holden’s lips as he swings high, aiming for my neck, but his action is careless and easy to avoid. I duck down and swing hard at the side of his knees.

‘Fuck!’ he cries out. The sudden pain is enough for him to loosen the grip on his sword and it’s the only advantage I need. As I stand back up, I swing my sword higher, putting my body’s momentum behind it and striking the underside of Holden’s blade, knocking it from his hand.

‘Bitch,’ he snarls as the sword clatters to the ground, but he makes no attempt to reach for it. Instead, he brings his hands together, lengthening his fingers and twisting his wrists. I brace myself, ready to duck his fire, but nothing comes. From the pinch of his brow, he’s as confused as I am.

‘I’d say she won that one, wouldn’t you?’ It’s Kyor. He’s watching us from a short distance away, and next to him stands Roderick, Zelle’s replacement siphon.

My chest stutters. Is that pride in Kyor’s expression or something else?

‘I’m sure there are other Rettlings who would benefit from your aid now, Commander,’ Roderick says, though Holden doesn’t so much as glance in his direction. His eyes are trained solely on me.

‘You got lucky, Kultavaris,’ he hisses. ‘And luck always runs out sooner or later.’

His words are so similar to the ones Jonas offered me this morning that they should probably sting. But they don’t. That wasn’t luck just now. That was me. And from the smile on Llinos’s and Benny’s faces, they both saw it.

Yet my gaze moves immediately from them to Kyor, as though seeking his approval.

Neither of us speak as his eyes trail down to my lips. How the hell my body can have such a feral response to just his gaze is beyond me, and yet it does. My heart is racing and it has nothing to do with the fight I just had.

‘I don’t know what you’re doing here,’ I say, trying to keep my tone casual. ‘But unless you’ve come to spar, we’re busy.’

‘Maybe that’s exactly what I’ve come for.’

His eyes lock on mine, and my mind is flooded with images of last night. It’s like I can taste him on my tongue, can feel his hands gently pulling my hair …

Fuck. I’m pretty sure I’m going to start panting.

Tingles start on my skin, static running up and down my body. I want to moan, but I bite my lip.

Damn him! He is toying with me.

‘Well,’ I say, snapping myself out of it before I lose any more control. ‘Then I’ll leave you to it. Enjoy your workout. Llin and I need to get ready for the ball.’

‘Actually, I’m not going.’ Llinos makes no attempt to hide her eavesdropping.

Kyor’s attention finally shifts from me to her, and a single crease forms between his brows.

‘You’re not? Why?’

She moves closer. ‘Because the rules about who is and isn’t allowed to attend are archaic and serve only to bolster the—bolster certain egos.’

Kyor’s frown and confusion only increase.

‘She means her girlfriend can’t come because she’s a scribe and not a member of the court,’ I snap, wanting this ridiculous conversation to be over with as quickly as possible. ‘Now, if you don’t mind, we need to go.’

With the sword still in my hand, I swing around, loop my spare arm into Llinos’s, and drag her away.

‘What are you doing talking to him?’ I hiss. ‘We don’t initiate conversation with Kyor.’

She lifts her eyebrows accusingly. ‘Well, how about I’ll keep my mouth shut … if you tell me the truth about what happened between you and him? And Jonas, too?’

I let out a long sigh. She’s not going to let this go, and maybe it’ll help to get some advice. After all, it’s not like it can make things worse.

OceanofPDF.com

Chapter 53

‘Idon’t know what it is between Kyor and me. Just physical attraction, I guess.’

‘But you and Jonas kissed,’ Llinos says, her brow creased in concentration as she slices through another ballgown.

‘Things have changed since then. Last night he wanted something more to happen, but I turned him down.’

‘And you said no because of this attraction to Kyor?’ Her eyes glint as she speaks. ‘Two hot guys wanting you. I can’t imagine how difficult it must be. I mean, have you thought about having both? At the same time?’

I offer her my best glower. ‘No, I haven’t.’

I haven’t seen Jonas since he stormed off at breakfast, and I’m sure it’s deliberate. We almost always cross each other’s paths in the dining hall or the battle yard, but today there’s been no sign of him. If it wasn’t for the fact that I’m desperate to see Kay, I’d skip the ball and hang out with Llinos rather than potentially having to face Jonas.

The dress Llin chooses for tonight is different from the others. The high neck cuts a horizontal line across my collarbones, while the back plunges all the way down to the base of my spine. While the top is black, the colour blends down into a deep blood-red on the skirt. The final detail is the slit. It’s a change from the normal fighting-shorts style – clearly Llin wanted to try something different – but it’s hardly modest, so high up my leg it’s almost at hip height.

‘Well.’ Llinos steps back. ‘If your aim is to have them physically drawing swords over you, this will definitely do that. And by swords, I mean⁠—’

‘Just don’t.’ I shoot her a glare.

She snickers. ‘I’m just saying it’s hot as hell.’ She studies me. ‘I think we should leave your hair loose tonight. Straight. Give me a minute and I’ll see if I can get rid of some of that frizz.’