“What was that?”

Nothing. That’s what I should have said.

But this time I raised my gaze, forcing myself to really take a look at my bully. I’d spent the night in a cell with a vampire, argued with him, defied him. Somehow, Nelson didn’t seem quite as scary by comparison. Where the vampire was tall, Nelson’s shoulders slouched like he was always falling towards you. His hair was matted, the same dark dirty brown like all of ours was, because even his elevated position among us didn’t allow for bathing.

“It’s not forever,” I repeated. “My sentence. I only have three years left. Then I’ll be released from this place. You’ll still be here, still taking rats, but I’m going to be free.”

I braced for the slap. For the fury. In that moment, I even convinced myself it would be worth it.

But Nelson didn’t slap me. His face didn’t contort with rage.

He laughed. He laughed so hard the rat he’d stolen dropped to the floor; he clutched his stomach, rolling his head back with laughter.

“Free?” he said between laughs. “You, free? That’s the funniest thing I’ve heard in years.”

“Fifteen years. That’s my sentence. I’ve served twelve already.” My words were clipped, quick arrows trying to cut through his laughter.

They bounced off Nelson’s chuckles uselessly. If anything, they made him laugh harder and harder, until he coughed, and his spit flew at me.

Choke, I thought. I pictured it, wrapping my hands around his neck the way I did the rats. Pictured myself twisting.

“You’re too funny. You really think they’ll let you walk out of here? Caria’s tits, that’s a good one. I’ll have to tell Robbie. You’re so simple, Sam.” He loved the sound of his voice dearly. “There’s no end.”

“There is,” I protested. “Three more years.” Just three more, and I could leave these dark, scream-filled halls behind and join the Monastery.

He smirked. “Who d’you suppose is keeping count? Anyone who knew you has forgotten you exist. No one is going to come get you. Think, Sammy.”

My normal revulsion to his assigned nickname was drowned out by the roar in my ears as the implication hit me.

Forgotten by everyone.

“Someone has to sign off on your release. And that someone is me. Your sentence is done when I write to the king and say it’s done.”

My gut twisted. Technically, Nelson wasn’t a prisoner like the rest of us. He was a noble, and while in high society he would’ve been as valuable as a gutter rat, here he had absolute power.

He grinned at my obvious distress. “Who knows? In another ten, twenty years, Sammy, we could be friends, and you’ll talk me into letting the royals know your sentence is finished. But mark my words, you will never leave without my blessing, and you’re nowhere close to earning it.”

Acid boiled in my stomach, a mix of fury and nausea.

“You can’t do that,” I protested, even though reality was forcing the walls to close in on all sides. Because yes, he could.

My future hinged on Nelson’s charity.

I was doomed.

“And who would stop me?” He shrugged, as if it was just a fact of life. “Besides, you’re better off in here than out there. Even if ol’ King Stormblood himself came down to pardon a gutter rat like you, do you know what kind of life you’d have? No one would hire a filthy thing like you. Even the brothels wouldn’t take you, except to have something cheap on the menu. When they used you up, you’d be on the streets. See how much you make begging with your ugly face.”

Nelson laughed again, then turned, collecting the rat once more.

This time, I didn’t say anything.

His words played on a loop over and over. Twelve years I’d been here. I’d be here ten more. Twenty. Forever, if it was truly up to Nelson. Until either he grew so tired of me he killed me.

Or I killed myself to make it end.

I bent into a corner of the hall and heaved, vomiting up what bit of precious food my stomach had held. The smell, foul as it was, actually drew the rats forward. I killed them with only half a mind, still turning over Nelson’s speech. Even as I killed their brethren, they came forward. They were starving, and any chance of food, at survival, however disgusting, was worth it to them.

Did they know they were doomed?

One came slower, dragging a trap half caught on its neck, squealing, squealing. I snapped its neck. Put it out of its misery.

I collected the last of them and brought them to Cook.

Nelson left me alone. Apparently, he’d had his fill of tormenting me today.

But there would be tomorrow.

And the day after. And the one after that.

He’s lying. He has to be. I nearly vomited again in the sink, but there was nothing in me but the barest bit of water. The acidic taste clawed my throat while I forced myself to swallow it down. Now was not the time to show weakness.

Nelson’s taunts played over and over in my head.

My life.

Forever.

If Nelson had his way, I’d never make it to the Monastery.

I’d never see the sun again.

I can’t do this. I can’t.

Death on my terms would be better than a life like this. A life of dark hallways, of killing rats, of Nelson’s taunts.

I took my time with the dishes, my mind clouded and hot. Even when the kitchen emptied, I kept scrubbing dish after dish, my mind turning over what I’d learned. I’d thought about escaping before—it was impossible. Especially for someone like me.

But maybe not for everyone.

Once everyone else had gone to sleep, I tip-toed behind Nelson’s desk and slipped the skeleton key into my pocket. I hid in the shadows and kept my footsteps silent, counting the cells until I hit number 48.

The key slid into the oiled lock without a sound.

Red eyes flared open, meeting mine.

“I’m going to let you out.”

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Chapter Four

The vampire’s white brows drew together. “What changed?”

“I don’t confide in vampires.” I drew a breath. “But I’ll make you a deal. I’ll unlock your shackles. In exchange, you get me out of Greymere, unharmed.”

The truth was, even if the bloodsucker agreed, I had no guarantee he’d follow through. But what choice did I have? Even if he killed me, he’d only be accelerating my fate.

“You have my word.”

It should’ve been hard to make myself step into the room. To betray my country and every value I held dear. To willingly unleash this beast on Greymere. But like a cornered animal seeing a sliver of a chance at escape, I barreled forward.

This late at night, the cell was utterly dark. The faint torches from the hall barely reached the bars. The vampire’s red eyes seemed to glow, tracking my steps into the cell.

The chains wrapped all around his legs, with locks on both feet and hands. I started with the feet. I didn’t want to be kneeling before him when his hands were free, even if we theoretically had a temporary alliance.

I slid the skeleton key into the lock of one, then the other. The manacles snapped open, but the vampire didn’t make a move to kick them away, even though the skin under them was covered in blisters. I tugged them away as quietly as I could to avoid the telltale sound of metal against stone. Next came the hands. I rose to my feet, adjusting my body so I wasn’t directly facing the vampire. I’d been close to him last night, but being in front of someone was a different kind of closeness. Standing slightly to the side, I could see his back. If possible, it looked even worse than yesterday.

“I’m sorry to say they undid your efforts,” he said, as if reading my thoughts.

Heat rushed across the back of my neck. Caught. I shouldn’t care. He was just a vampire. But something like shame licked at me all the same.

“I’m not surprised.” They only ever healed to inflict more pain.