Maxim moved abruptly and got burned with hot tea again, but did not even feel the pain. His heart contracted. He stopped breathing and held to the wall to get himself together. He thought that his heart would jump out of the chest after he had realized what he needed to do. All of the sudden his tired brain produced the answer to the most difficult question! These thoughts were a result of the long and laborious mental work. They were supposed to calm him down; however, they almost made him loose consciousness. After catching up breath, Max covered his face with hands and could not believe in what he would have to do. He should be able to realize it right away! He needs to become a better person. Svetlana needs to see his best qualities to believe in their feelings and become completely dissolved in it! This should be her life credo. She won’t be able to live without it. Svetlana needs to reach apogee of her feelings with his help, while Maxim needs to destroy the strength of all efforts, feelings and everything else in one moment. Specifically, in one moment! On top of that, this moment must affect Svetlana psychologically more, then the car accident did. In this case, she will be able to have a child from her husband, and her love won’t be gone like her dream to have a baby and happiness once did. It is necessary to guide love in the necessary direction, so that Svetlana would love her husband, her son and a future baby! It’s not important, weather it will be a boy or a girl. It is necessary for everything to go according to the plan. After this important moment, which holds the essence of the plan, Max must disappear from her life, but where and how he does not know yet. Love will fade with time. If he does not disappear right away, then all his efforts would turn into the waste of time: there won’t be a baby and happiness! Maxim was analyzing his new role. He was not surprised that thoughts were flying in his head very fast. This is why he understood that he had very little time for his plan. To disappear does not mean to leave. It means to set yourself free from love to Svetlana; not now, and not later, but at the time of the important moment.
How to let his love go? A tear ran down Max’s cheek, but he wiped it off and said seriously: “You are responsible for a very valuable task. I must do what I have to, and not what I want to! Think, think one more time and don’t nag!” He realized that he would have to make sacrifices. He needs to let his love go; no matter how hard it is to do; it must be done. Getting all the remaining energies, Maxim made the last decision: “I will give you everything that I have, Svetlana. Let the God help you to accept my love and do the right things with it. Don’t carry this burden, give it to your husband-you love him too. He will love you even more after that. Then you will have the complete and real harmony of love in all of its forms and will forget me in one moment. That will be a reward for my efforts and the motivation for new accomplishments…”
Max started to have thoughts that it is necessary to complicate his task Why? He always had the same answer to this question: “Then it will be easier to understand the responsibility and unreality of the assignment”. Many people thought that his answer was a joke; the others simply did not understand him. However, it did not affect Max, his decisions, and obviously not his actions. He could always achieve the necessary result, adding something else to the main goal. When he realized his goal completely, he felt sad. Max did not want to disappear and turn into the myth… He decided to spend one year for his mission. Then he would transfer to a different, unfamiliar school to let Svetlana and every one know his intentions. He wanted everyone to understand his courage and what it his decision costed him. He wanted the whole world to realize something new: a border between realistic and impossible, unmanageable and tangible. That a fifteen-year-old boy could create unachievable: ideal family, a baby and unlimited happiness. The cost is giving his life as a sacrifice and rejecting love and everything what is connected with it. He will grant love and family happiness, exterminate all problems and severities. He will open people’s eyes to see the real world, so that they could enjoy happy moments without thinking negatively. Max made a decision that he will do everything possible in order for the plan to work ideally. He will do something that people dream to accomplish, but make mistakes and choose wrong paths. They befoul themselves and can’t reach virginal purity, get confused by their own words, thoughts and actions. People forget verity, hide from it, don’t trust each other, suspect, envy, get jealous – do things that don’t worth the time. When the grandiose bestowal of love and family happiness stay and knock on the door, they hide away in horror. More then likely, people are afraid to experience this unexceptionable feeling because it will make them feel so feeble and worthless, that this feeling will destroy their world.
It was extremely difficult for Maxim to realize that for the happiness of other people he needs to make sacrifices. Even the thought to decline the plan passed his mind. However, Max was not used to be weak. Moreover, how can the happiness of his beloved woman and her family compare to the pathetic pity for himself? There is nothing to think about! On top of that he understood that he will only feel fortunate when Svetlana finds her family happiness with his help. Her baby will be born from his psychological efforts and not from the physical love. Of course, Maxim did not deny this love and thought that other people can misunderstand and besmirch his mission with malign thoughts. However, later, when the result will be obvious people will understand that they were wrong. They will writhe with shame and would not know what to do before Maxim forgives them. Then everyone will say: “Forgive me God!” and everyone will repent. Everyone.
“So, – Maxim said to himself, – mission is possible! Good luck! God, bless my way of truth and light! Act through me, since I am your bondman on earth. I’ll come to you through your Son, pure and chaste. I’ll be faithful to your words. So let it happen!”
XV
– Hello, mom!
Nikita ran to Svetlana and gave her a hug. She even dropped her bags when she saw him.
– Hey there, sweetie! You can’t imagine how happy I am to see you home!
– I decided to surprise you and showed up all of the sudden! I missed you, mom.
Svetlana was kissing and hugging her son, holding him tight. They were crying.
– Svetlana, what are you doing at the door? Come in, get changed…
Her husband got quite when he saw bags full of groceries. He was concerned for her because she was not supposed to carry anything heavy…
– Nikita, let mom change, she is hot already. You can help me to take care of the groceries in the mean while.
– Of course.
Taking bags, Vadim and Nikita went to the kitchen, while Svetlana, taking off clothing in the corridor, experienced a strange feeling of strength. Her husband did not say a word when he saw the bags, – it was already good. That means he is also working on himself and not just feels sorry for her. She liked that, but decided not to think of it too much. It is the way it should be – period.
– Svetlana! Where are you?!
– I am on my way! Are you done?
– I think it is a perfect time for dinner? What is your opinion?
– I am all for it! Do you have a surprise for me?
Entering the kitchen, Svetlana saw a decorated set-out table. Son presented her with a bouquet of flowers while her husband hugged her tenderly like never before, saying,
– Of course, dear, it is all for you.
– Congratulations, mom! We love you!
– I love you too, my dear! Thank you so much! Happy New Year one more time! Merry Christmas! – Svetlana stood up, raising a glass with champagne, and continued: