A faint silvery glow of eather formed an aura around my pupils.

How long had it been like that?

I hadn’t noticed it the day before. Granted, I’d been distracted by the state of my busted face.

I swallowed, drawing back. Did this mean that despite the ceeren’s sacrifice, I was even closer to my Ascension?

To death.

“Damn it,” I whispered, wrapping the towel around me. There was nothing I could do about it now.

It wasn’t like I was unbothered by the fact that I was close to dying as I left the bathing area of my quarters. Death was as common to me as it was to those Chosen.

I’d spent my entire life accepting that it would find me. That I wouldn’t have a long life, and there was no escape. It had only been that short span of time between when Ash had shared his plans to remove the embers and we’d learned what would happen that I had begun to think of a possible future.

I wasn’t thinking of that now—at least one that involved me.

Once more kneeling at the chests, I took a bit more time searching for something close to what I’d typically wear.

I searched some more.

There was nothing, but I already figured as much. I had just been doing…wishful looking.

Disgusted, I grabbed a white frock. The halter style of the gown left my shoulders and arms completely exposed, and the material was some sort of gossamer and lace fabric. But at least it was loose-fitting at the bust and below the hips.

Weary, I sat on the divan and began working the tangles out of my hair with the comb I’d retrieved from the vanity. The monotony of the act calmed me, allowing me to think more clearly about the idea of, well…everything, including Kolis delaying my Culling.

Kolis may not know the embers could not be removed without my death—something not even Ash had been aware of. After all, Primal embers had never been inside a mortal before.

However, from what I’d been told, not even gods always survived the Culling. And godlings, which I was the closest to, were even more at risk of dying during the process.

So even if Kolis could Ascend me, there was a high probability I wouldn’t survive. That was why he’d stopped. He could’ve tried right then to take the embers without killing me. He hadn’t.

Either way, there was a good chance Kolis had no idea that only Ash could Ascend me. Even more importantly, though? I didn’t think Kolis could Ascend me, even if I hadn’t taken Ash’s blood.

I thought back to the injuries I’d received when Veses freed the entombed gods in the Red Woods. I’d been pretty torn up. Ash’s blood had made it like those wounds never happened. Clearly, Kolis’s blood didn’t have the healing properties Ash’s did. He wouldn’t have had to take me to the ceeren if it did.

But what the ceeren sacrificed for me? Had it done more than just save my life? Had it also slowed the Culling? If so…

Could something like that be done again…and again? Basically, delaying my Ascension for months or even years?

Using the essence of others—their life force—to keep me alive didn’t seem all that impossible because I felt fine. Better than, actually—well, except for the ache in my face and throat. Other than that, there was no headache or weakness. I didn’t have that bone-deep exhaustion that had plagued me before.

But if I stayed alive, that meant the embers—

“No.” I shut down that line of thought before it could grow. I wouldn’t even consider the idea of sacrificing lives to save others. There had—

A strange noise startled me, causing my head to jerk up. A resounding whoosh from outside echoed into the silent chamber. The sunlight in one window suddenly disappeared.

The comb slipped from my fingers as a…a hawk flew in through one of the windows near the ceiling—an enormous silver hawk with a wingspan the width of my arms.

I figured I had to be hallucinating as I watched the bird dive right for the cage. It angled its body sideways at the very last moment, gliding between the bars. My lips parted as it circled above and then swooped down, its dark talons latching on to the top of a bedpost.

Keen, sharp eyes a vivid, intense shade of blue locked onto mine—eyes full of wisps of silvery eather. Tucking its wings close to its body, the hawk pushed off the bedpost—

And shifted. All at once, I felt the warm pulse of awareness in my chest as a burst of thousands of tiny, silvery stars swallowed the bird’s body. I recognized the feeling as the dazzling explosion of light lengthened and took the shape of a man—a Primal.

I shot to my feet, my hand going to my thigh out of reflex but coming up empty as the spectacle of lights faded. A broad chest with golden-bronze flesh replaced feathers. My gaze shot up as brownish-blond hair settled against a cut jaw and a…scarred left cheek.

The Primal God of War and Accord stood before me.

CHAPTER TEN

A surge of pure, red-hot anger coursed through me as Attes took a step toward me. “Seraphena—”

I reacted without hesitation, and this time, I wasn’t slow or weak. Swinging at him with every ounce of strength I had in me, I caught him in the jaw with my fist.

Pain erupted across my knuckles as Attes grunted, his head snapping back. I cursed, shaking my throbbing hand.

“Fuck,” Attes bit out, pressing his hand to his jaw as he lowered his chin. His chest rose with a deep breath. “I suppose I deserved that, but godsdamn, you can hit.”

“You deserve worse than that.” I started toward him.

“I’m sure I do.” Attes held up a hand, sidestepping me. “But you make a move against me one more time, and you will bring out my most basic Primal nature,” he warned, his eyes blazing with fiery eather. “And you do not want that.”

I wasn’t so sure.

The embers throbbed fiercely in my chest, pressing against my skin. They wanted out—wanted at him. Or, more likely, they were simply responding to what I wanted.

However, some level of common sense prevailed. I knew I wouldn’t win a fight against the Primal of fucking War and Accord.

I forced myself to back down. “You betrayed us.”

“You already said that.” Watching me warily, he lowered his arm. “But you’re wrong.”

“I don’t think so,” I spat.

His eyes narrowed. “What I did was save lives, you little hellion.”

“Save lives?” I let out a scathing laugh as I stepped back even farther in an attempt to cling to my rapidly waning common sense. “Exactly how did you accomplish that by launching an attack on the Shadowlands alongside your brother?”

“I launched no attack against the Shadowlands. If I had, they would be nothing but ruins.” Eather crackled in his eyes. “And my brother had no choice. When Kolis had you kill Thad, it forced Kyn’s hand. Just as Kolis planned.”

My stomach twisted with nausea as I thought about the young draken Kolis had forced me to slaughter as punishment for Ash not seeking his permission before announcing that he was taking me as his Consort. “I brought Thad back.”

“I remember. But Kyn didn’t know that. He still doesn’t, for obvious reasons,” he reminded me. “Kyn was supposed to capture you, but not before he leveled the Shadowlands, leaving only the road to the Abyss and the Vale remaining. When I took you, I stopped that from happening.”

I inhaled sharply, thinking about the people in the city of Lethe, both mortal and god. I felt a little dizzy. “Was that what Kolis ordered?”

“In a roundabout way. He told Kyn to make a statement.” Attes’s shoulders tensed. “You don’t tell a Primal of War or Vengeance that and not expect utter devastation.”

I swallowed down the knot of fear building in my throat.

“The attack ended as soon as I took you,” Attes said. “I swear.”

“You give your word?” I sneered, heart thumping. “As if that means anything.”