“What happens if you do?”

“Why does that matter?”

I shrug. “Just curious. Do you and your brothers die?”

“Brothers?”

Now I’m confused. “Am I misremembering my crash course in the gods of this world? I thought there were three fates, past, present and future?”

“Yes.”

“But…you’re not brothers?”

“Is Aron brothers with his Aspects?”

Huh. I didn’t think of it that way. “So you’re an Aspect.”

“Did I say that? Or are you assuming that?”

“You said it earlier!”

“Did I?” His smile grows wider.

I huff out a breath. “Jesus, you’re frustrating.”

“I said I would give you answers,” he tells me, moving toward my direction once more. “I did not say how many answers, or to what.”

Right. Answers. “You haven’t given me any answers. You realize that, right?”

“Haven’t I? You can go home, or you can stay here. Aron dies either way, it is just a matter of when. The choice is yours.”

I clench my fists. “You know that’s no choice.”

“Is it not?” He arches an elegant brow at me. “This particular Aspect has a one in three chance of ascending back to the Aether in the correct order…provided he does not murder you first.”

“Murder me?” Now this guy’s just making me angry. “Aron would never hurt me—”

“Not willingly, no. Have you forgotten how you arrived here, lovely Faith?”

And that shuts me up, because he’s right. I have totally forgotten. Aron drew on his power to kill the damn lake snake, and in doing so, he nearly destroyed me. He wasn’t trying to, he just lost his temper and pulled on our bond too much.

“He is a war god,” the Spidae says again, his voice cool. “He cares for you, but he would not be the first or last god to destroy his anchor by accident.”

I think of Aron and how tenderly he held me as I fuzzed in and out of consciousness. The nosebleed I had at the farm when he made the rain stop. The crashing headache and the feeling of being sucked dry as he floated above the boat, wielding magic in a show of power I’d never seen before. Aron wouldn’t hurt me willingly.

But he still hurt me.

I could still go home to Earth. Abandon him here and forget he ever existed. He’ll still live on in a certain way. Just…not that Aron. He’ll wear the same face but he won’t be the same man.

I hug my arms close to my chest, feeling very small and alone. “I don’t know what to do.”

“That I do not have an answer for, I am afraid.” For the first time, the Spidae sounds sympathetic.

“Which one are you? Past, present or future?” I look over at him, an idea occurring to me. “Can’t we go ask future for the answer?”

The Spidae’s mouth turns up in a smile. “He is busy with Aron, because I wished to speak to you.”

You mean you wished to fill my head with questions and doubts, I mentally retort, but keep the words to myself. The Spidae is pretending to be benevolent, but I haven’t forgotten for a moment that he’s a god. An unbalanced one with no anchor, no less. All of this could be a ploy to manipulate me into doing something that he wants me to do. “Do I have to decide if I’m staying here or going home? Right now?”

“You have time,” he says, inclining his head. “Aron will acquiesce to your request.”

“Request?” I frown in his direction. “What request?”

“Your request to stay for a while longer. To relax here.” He gestures at the tower. “You are tired and want time before you must confront his next Aspect. I have seen it in the web.”

“I thought you said future was busy with Aron?”

He only smiles mysteriously.

“You suck.”

“But I am never wrong.” The Spidae nods at me and gestures at the open portal that leads to the long, winding hall. “You will find Aron at the base of the stairs, in the large chamber there.”

I can’t thank him for that tidbit. I feel…hollow. Like I’ve been dragged over a wringer for the last half hour. He’s given me hope and destroyed it all over again. There’s nothing to be thankful for about that. I want to cry. I want to give up.

I want Aron to put his arms around me and stroke my hair until all the pain goes away, but even that won’t make me forget. I have to choose between myself or Aron. There can’t be an “us” ever. We won’t be allowed even the tiniest bit of happiness. Fate’s going to fuck us over.

Even so, it feels weird to just turn and leave silently. It feels like a retreat. I hesitate, then take a step toward the door. “Later.”

“If he asks,” the Spidae begins, and I bite back a snarl of irritation. Of course he has to have the last word. Of course. The Spidae continues, oblivious to my mood. “Tell Aron he needs to go to Yshrem and meet the army there.”

“What?” I cast him an irritated look.

“That is where Aron will meet his destiny,” the Spidae says, then adds, “This particular Aspect of the Lord of Storms.”

My mouth is suddenly dry as a bone. Him meeting his destiny sounds…dire. Add in “army” and I’m terrified. “Is he going to make it through that battle?”

The Spidae just stares at me.

Right. I’m sorry I asked. I shake my head and turn away again.

“You forgot this.”

When I turn around, he’s right behind me, and I jump in surprise. The Spidae holds out the football-sized pod and gives me a wintry smile. When I take it, he moves away again.

“Think on what I have said,” he calls as I leave the room. “Think on the choices you make…because they are all yours to make, Faith.”

OceanofPDF.com

63

Once I’m in the hall, I rush down the slope at breakneck speed. I just want to get away.

Away from all of this.

Away from everything I’ve been told in the last few minutes.

The Spidae and his non-answers have wrecked me. Fucking destroyed me. I stumble over my skirts, skidding to my knees, and the sticky webs that cover everything stop me from tumbling all the way to the bottom of the tower. I skid a few feet and then collapse against the wall, crying like a baby. I curl up, hugging my knees to my chest and sobbing.

Everything is so fucked right now.

I can screw over Aron and hate myself for the rest of my life if I return to Earth. It’s a selfish choice, and even if I wanted to make it, I wouldn’t. I want to save Aron, but I have to think of everyone. Poor Vitar is dead. What about Yulenna, Markos, Solat and Kerren? Will they die if I choose to stay? Am I picking their deaths for them, too?

And Aron—my Aron—has to ascend for things to be “fixed.” That means I have to die.

I don’t want to die. A fresh sob escapes me, and I grind my fists against my eyes. Why have I fought so hard for the last month to go home, to help Aron win, only to find out that none of it matters? If I go home, I destroy Aron.

It doesn’t feel fair.

I cry and cry, feeling sorry for myself. For being the one that’s responsible for Aron’s death. For being the one that has to make a choice, and for the fact that there are no good choices at all. There’s no right answer in any of this, only more heartbreak.

If I’d known that taking Aron’s hand that day would have led to this, would I have done it? I think for a moment, then let out a bitter laugh, shaking my head. Like I had any other choice? I was going to be executed—a cleaver bride sacrificed in the god’s name. Beyond that, though…I can’t regret volunteering to be with Aron. I think of him with another anchor, holding her close, laughing with her…

And I’m hit with an ugly gut-wrench of pure, seething jealousy.

I’m shocked at how violent my thoughts get. Just imagining Aron with someone else makes me want to claw his—and her—eyes out. Fuck that. He’s mine.