I ignored the wounds caused by his previous admission, shrugging sadly. “I would. Of course, I would. But I have work.”

He stiffened, looking out the window with layers of grief. “I’ll pay you triple what they are.”

“You can’t. You need the money for whatever this guy has over you.”

“I won’t let you work for free.”

“I can’t work for you at all. But I’ll help you find—”

“Not enough time.” Sitting on the side of my bed, he took my hand in his. He squeezed it until my bones scrunched together, and I winced. “I’m not a begging man, but when it comes to you, I seem to kneel often.” He looked at my hands, stroking my knuckles with his thumb. “I have no dignity left. I have no honour or self-respect. I will do whatever it takes to pay my debts. I will hurt and steal to ensure every penny is paid. Do you hear what I’m saying?” His gaze flashed violent and honest. “I would sacrifice anything, anyone. I’m the lowest of the low.” He slid off the mattress and onto his knees.

Before, he’d knelt between my legs to grant me angry pleasure. Now, he knelt at my side pleading for things I couldn’t understand. Just like he’d knelt and begged me to lie to the police.

“Call in sick. One day. I’ll paint fast. I’ll do the commission and get the money, and you can go back to your cubicle.”

I sniffed. “I’m not embarrassed of my cubicle, Gil. It’s a steady paycheque. I’m grateful for it.”

“And I’d be forever grateful if you help me earn a paycheque too.”

I wanted to say no—not out of vindictiveness but out of loyalty to an employer who allowed me to keep my apartment and food on the table.

But...

Gil.

He looked at me like he used to at school when he’d hidden a bruised rib or bleeding nose from class but trusted me to keep his wounds secret and heal them. He’d trusted me not to pity him. He’d trusted me to love him regardless of his actions and backstory.

My heart raced as I touched his cheek. “You’re not the lowest of the low.”

He chuckled, dark and empty. “You don’t know what I’ve done.”

“I know what you are.” I bent to kiss him.

He accepted the sweet kiss with a flinch.

He didn’t kiss me back.

“I’ll help you, Gilbert Clark.” I pulled away, his lips glistening in the shadows from mine. “One day. For tomorrow only, I’ll be your canvas.”

He nodded as if I’d just sentenced everyone he ever loved to death. Standing, he pulled out his phone and texted whoever he’d previously denied. Once he’d accepted the commission, he turned to me in the darkness. “There are many things between us, O. Things you’ll never understand. But I need you to know...you’re saving my life tonight. You’ve saved it before...recently with lying about the license plate, and previously when we were younger. Every injury you bandaged, every painkiller you administered, I knew I could never repay you.” His voice roughened. “I can never give you what you’ve just given me. Thank you isn’t enough, but I’ll say it anyway.”

OceanofPDF.com

His eyes captured mine, and he bowed low and eternally grateful. “Thank you. Thank you, Olin Moss...for being you.”

OceanofPDF.com

Chapter Twenty-Seven

______________________________

Gil

-The Past-

ANOTHER WEEK OF discomfort.

Another week of watching Ms Tallup pick on Olin in class: two detentions and a trip to the principal’s office. Each reprimand I did my best not to leap from my desk and punch the bitch-teacher in the face.

Olin didn’t have a clue why she was being targeted.

But I did.

I was the reason.

I knew it every time Ms Tallup glanced my way.

I knew it every time I felt her eyes on me in the cafeteria and school hall.

I knew it with utmost certainty when I hung back from class on Friday and prepared to fight for Olin’s future.

Mine might be fucked but Olin’s...I wouldn’t let anything destroy it—let alone a teacher who wanted things she could never have.

“Gil.” Olin snuggled into my side as our fellow students packed up their school bags. “My parents are away all weekend.” Her voice lowered. “Stay. Sleep over.”

My eyes shot wide, looking down at her. This wasn’t the first time her parents had stayed away for days, but it was the first time she’d asked me to sleep there. To slip into her bed. To touch her in the dark. To strip her, kiss her, take her.

I squeezed my eyes against the images, cursing the sudden tightness in my jeans. Why did she have to choose today of all days to break me?

I had a plan.

A script to follow.

Outside of school, it was no secret things were burning between us. She wanted me as much as I wanted her. Her touches were different. Her stares more heated. We could barely be around each other without jumping when we touched and breathing hard for forbidden things.

Our bodies had been patient.

Our hearts had swapped and no longer belonged to us but to each other.

Sex was the natural evolution of our connection.

And I wanted it.

Wanted her.

So fucking much.

All I wanted to do was nuzzle her nose with mine and whisper yes.

Yes to taking her.

Yes to love.

Yes to making her mine.

But Ms Tallup watched my every move. Her eyes made me sick. Her concentration made me shake. And right now, her gaze sent poisoned arrows into my flesh.

I couldn’t let Olin keep paying for my mistakes.

I had to guard her...forever.

Swallowing hard, I prepared myself to hurt the one person I adored more than anything, all in the name of protecting her. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?”

Olin sighed with impatience, but she didn’t click to my betrayal. Her tongue licked her bottom lip, not taking my snark for an answer. “We’ll talk about it. But it’s happening. You’re sleeping over tonight, Gilbert Clark. I can’t wait another day.”

Ms Tallup couldn’t hear us, but our protection of other students had gone, and her stare was ever more venomous. Pushing Olin away, I withdrew from her, doing my best to seem cold-hearted and annoyed. “Go home, Olin. We’re done here.”

Her eyes flared with hurt, studying me helplessly. “Wait...what...?”

“Go on. You know the way.” I raised my voice to ensure a certain teacher heard. “Leave me alone.” I crippled inside for being such a heartless liar.

I wanted to cuddle her close and whisper that it was all just an act. An act that I hoped Ms Tallup bought. An act that would buy her freedom from the wickedest teacher in this school. My voice glittered with ice as I bled deep inside. “We’re through.”

One of the girls who Olin hung out with before me slung her bag on and tugged Olin’s hand. “Come on. He’s being a jerk. I’ll walk you home.”

I forced myself not to shake with gratefulness with how loud she spoke. I’d pre-arranged this pantomime. I’d asked Olin’s friend to call me names, put me down, slam and shame me.

All for an audience of one.

Olin’s shock and heartbreak had to be real, but she did too good a job as her eyes watered and she looked at me as if I’d suffocated the love right out of her.

I crossed my arms and clenched my teeth, wrapping myself in as much frost as I could. “Go away, O.”

“You don’t mean this. Why are you doing this?” Tears spilled from Olin’s hazel gaze.

“I do mean it. We’re done.”

“I don’t understand. This can’t be real. What are you—”

Olin’s friend dragged her toward the exit. “Come on, O. He’s such a prick. You can do so much better, you know. No one likes him, anyway. Such a loser.”

I flinched as Olin twisted to keep her eyes on mine, searching for some sign that this was a cruel joke.

Cruel, absolutely.

A joke, definitely not.