“This dance is for archons and consorts,” I said stiffly.

I was basically commanding her. But I didn’t care. There was no way I was dancing with Regan.

I could tell she didn’t want to cause a scene. Especially as the entire ballroom was watching us.

“Fine,” she said, placing her hand in mine. Her voice was distinctly lacking in enthusiasm.

Still, I felt triumphant as I led her onto the dance floor just as the lights dimmed for the waltz.

The dance was a time-honored tradition. A way of closing out the longest night of the year and celebrating the forging of bonds for the new one to come.

I gripped Pendragon’s waist firmly, pulling her a little closer than was strictly necessary. I was relieved when she didn’t resist.

I wanted her to feel my presence. To know I was here with her, for her–more than Kage or anyone else ever would be.

“You know,” I began, as we glided across the floor. “They say that whoever you dance with during the Longest Waltz will share a deep bond with you in the coming year. It was a mortal tradition, originally. A tad sentimental but rather romantic, don’t you think?”

Was this really me talking? Part of me wanted to slap myself. I was taking a chance. A chance of looking like a huge idiot.

Pendragon didn’t respond right away. Her gaze was fixed over my shoulder, as if she was trying not to meet my eyes.

I felt a sting of frustration coil around me as the silence stretched. It had been a subtle gesture that meant more than it seemed. And yet, she didn’t seem to care.

When she finally spoke, her voice was chilly. “Blake, you’ve treated me like shit for the first half of the year. I doubt that’s going to suddenly change in the new one just because we’re dancing.”

Her words hit me like a punch in the gut. I hadn’t expected her to speak so plainly and her bluntness caught me off guard.

A sharp retort rose to my lips. But I hesitated, as memories flashed through my mind.

The insults, the humiliations, the way I’d pushed her over and over again. She didn’t even know the half of it.

She was right. I didn’t want to admit it. But she was. I clenched my jaw, replaying every interaction we’d had.

I thought back to that first day I’d seen her. Naked and covered with blood. I’d been captivated from that first moment no matter how much I tried to convince myself otherwise.

It would have been so much easier to want someone like Regan. Someone who threw herself at me.

But no. It was Pendragon. Always Pendragon.

The more she tried to push me away, the more I wanted her.

She’d gotten under my skin in a way no one else ever had. This feeling wasn’t just hate anymore. There was something else here. Something deeper.

Something that terrified me.

Maybe it was the bloodwine, but suddenly it seemed to me that love and hate might not be that different. Ultimately, weren’t they just two sides of the same coin? I wasn’t sure which one I was feeling right now, but one thing was certain. I wanted her. More than I’d ever wanted anything.

And I wanted her to want me back. Even if she hated herself for it.

“Whatever I’ve done, it was only to make you stronger. You’re mine, Pendragon, and that won't ever change.” The words slipped out before I could stop them.

I could feel her tense beneath my touch, her body stiffening against me.

It was true. She was mine. No one else’s. Not Kage’s. Not anyone’s.

But she was tensing up in my arms. Her back straightened. Her head jerked up.

She looked at me, eyes narrowing, her face a mask of anger.

“I will never be yours, Blake Drakharrow. When will you get that through your thick highblood head?”

Before I could respond, before I could try to fix the mess I’d just made, she was gone. She tore herself out of my arms and stalked off the dance floor, leaving me standing there, stunned.

The room felt like it was closing in. I felt the gazes of the other students searing into my skin.

In the distance, I caught a glimpse of Kage Tanaka smirking, clearly enjoying my humiliation. But I noticed Pendragon hadn’t gone running to him.

I hadn’t meant to say those exact words, to push her away like that. But now, standing there alone, the weight of my failure came crashing down on me and I thought of my uncle’s threat.

He could take her away. Give her to someone else. Or keep her for himself.

But this wasn’t over. Not by a long shot.

My eyes followed Pendragon as she disappeared into the crowd, clearly heading towards the doors. My heart thudded painfully.

I wanted her. Needed her in a way that was starting to be a problem.

If she wasn’t going to come willingly, I’d take a different approach.

I walked off the dance floor and back over to the bar where I tossed back another glass of bloodwine. The liquor mixed with blood went straight to my head. Just like I wanted it to.

I felt calmer as the warm haze filled me up. Everything would be fine. There was still time. I’d gain the upper hand, get back in control. I’d make her see that she belonged with me, one way or another.

The night was far from over.

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CHAPTER 41 - MEDRA

I was shaking as I left the room, quivering with rage.

Blake Drakharrow could go straight to hell.

I swiped at my face, feeling the wetness on my hand. I wiped it away savagely. My emotions were a tangled mess. A knot of anger, hurt, and something else I didn’t want to even try to name.

I found a bench along the corridor outside the refectory and sank down onto it, leaning back against the cold stone wall.

I could still feel the press of Blake’s hands, lingering on my waist, and I hated it.

Students were beginning to trickle out of the ballroom, their laughter and chatter spilling into the hall.

I saw some couples sink into the shadows, their arms wrapped around one another. Some ran past me, giggling, hand in hand. Apparently the Dance of the Longest Night was also a great night for getting someone into your bed.

I hadn’t even said goodnight to Kage. Part of me didn’t want to. Who knew what he was expecting, what he might feel he was entitled to. But I had to give him credit. He’d been a perfect gentleman all evening, which was more than I could say for Blake.

I pressed myself further back on the bench, part of me just wanting to disappear. But then I saw Florence emerge from the ballroom.

“Medra, are you all right?” Florence asked, as she came over. “You rushed out so fast...”

I tried to smile. “I’m fine. Just needed some air.”

“Blake was being an asshole again?” she asked sympathetically.

I nodded. It was easier than telling her exactly what had happened. “How did your night go? Where’s Naveen?”

Florence glanced back. “He’s still inside, helping the ensemble pack up.”

With a pang of guilt, I realized I hadn’t even paid attention to Naveen’s solo. I’d been too absorbed in my own problems, first distracted by Kage, then by Blake. Naveen must have performed it while I was dancing with Blake.

I hadn’t heard a single note.

“I didn’t even really hear his solo,” I admitted. “I feel terrible.”

“He’ll understand,” Florence reassured me. “He probably won't even ask you about it. It went really well though. He played beautifully. Not a single wrong note. He looked so happy. Don’t worry, Medra. He had a good evening. This was everything he wanted.”

I studied her face. “Really? Everything? Did he...say anything to you?”

Her nose scrunched. “Like what?”

I sighed. That was a “no” then. “Never mind. I’ll tell you later.”

“Come on, walk back to the First Year tower with me. We can sit in the Common Room and listen to everyone gossip about their night,” Florence suggested. She winked. “And you can tell me all about Kage Tanaka and Blake Drakharrow fighting over you.”