"The story follows the narrator on a journey through the complicated life of a Jersey-born soul, who searches for love in a saga filled with sex, drugs, rock n' roll, lust and lunacy. Alan Chazen, born in the suburbs of New Jersey in the mid 1950's to upper middle-class Jewish parents is confronted by an ex-lover with whom he shared an adulterous affair some years before, causing him to reflect upon why, at 50 he is alone, having abandoned the two loves of his life so many years before; a girl and his music. He traces his plight to an epiphany at age 14, a particular moment in time when he saw his family for what they were - emotionally, spiritually and intellectually on a far different plane than he. The story follows Alan on his journey through his emotional and sexual evolution as he neurotically pursues the unattainable heart of another; not the love of his life. He becomes aware of the fact that he was a victim of an abusive, addicted and alcoholic mother, which caused him to prematurely enter into adulthood repressed - as a songwriter, a frustrated musician and ultimately as a spiritually unfulfilled attorney, evolving and discovering himself through sex, drugs, rock n' roll and the search for another, true love. The story traces his re-discovery of his musical soul and what became of the girl who first touched it."Lyrics from the protagonist's songs, providing him the only avenue for expressing his emotions are included in the text. A cd of actual studio-quality recordings of a selection of songs from the novel is available.