As an actress, Diana Quick was forever trying on the mask of other people's lives - raiding her own memory to service the character she was playing. Coming from a large, noisy family in Kent that seemed to be plain-speaking and straightforward, she was astonished to find on her beloved father's death that his childhood in India was far from idyllic. She was then thunderstruck to hear that he was to have a requiem mass. She had no idea he was Catholic. She discovered that his stepmother had got rid of him and his sister upon marrying his father and that he had grown up in almost total separation from his family. In the India office library she found records of a whole extended family she knew nothing about. Her search for the Quicks in India found roots that go back to Calcutta in the early 18th century. This is a story of a search for a past, the search for an understanding of exile and denial, and also the story of a very fine actress who has always had a sense of not quite belonging.